High heels, makeup, tight shirts, short skirts, the color pink. Girls, and people, in general, are always told when, where, and how much of them to wear. Whether we’re not wearing them enough or too much, when it comes to being “girly”, there’s always something we’re doing wrong.

As a little girl, I remember turning on the t.v. to see girls dressed in all pink, wearing nice clothes, and with their hair all done. When one of them would first appear, I would think, “Oh, she looks pretty”, only for her to be portrayed as either the mean girl or the dumb friend.

What do you think this taught me?

The once positive thoughts I had were replaced with “Oh, she must be the bully”.

It was engraved in my mind that if you’re “girly”, you’re shallow, self-absorbed, annoying and/or empty-headed. You can’t play sports, and it’d be against the laws of nature if you were smart. To put it bluntly, you’re a good-for-nothing: someone you shouldn’t want to be.

As I got older, I learned that if you wear tighter, shorter, more feminine clothes, along with makeup, you’re “trashy”. Desperate for attention, you’d even wear that to impress anyone that’d give you a second look. You’re the type of person that would flirt with someone else’s significant other and doesn’t have a decent personality.

While we might not even realize it, we buy-into this mindset by making comments like, “Look at what she’s wearing!” or “She’s wearing that? Really?” Hearing them all the time at school, you’ve probably done it too.

At the same time, if you don’t wear as much revealing clothing or “girly” clothes in general, you’re not feminine enough. Too boring and boyish, you’re never going to attract anyone dressing the way you do.