Shower Thoughts

Simple thoughts that make your head hurt.

Shower Thoughts
  • You can’t stand backwards on stairs


  • Fat chance and slim chance mean the same thing


  • You stomach thinks all potatoes are mashed


  • When you bite down on something, your actually biting up


  • At some point in your life you’ll pass the exact halfway mark without even knowing it


  • The lobsters in the kitchen on the Titanic must have thought it was a miracle


  • You never know what memories you lost


  • When you swim under water, you are also swimming above water


  • Some people just celebrated the year that they will die in


  • The only time the word “incorrectly” isn’t spelled incorrectly is when it’s spelled incorrectly


  • We will never hear about the truly perfect crime


  • I wonder if there are any times on the clock that I haven’t seen


  • If you view a bald eagle at the zoo you are looking at the American symbol of freedom in captivity


  • Asking someone “Where are you” is a recent thing. Before we had mobile phones, the only way could talk to people is if we knew where they were


  • Poultry farmers are literally chicken tenders


  • A different version of you exists in the minds of everyone who knows you


  • If two people on either side of the world drop a piece of bread the world briefly becomes a sandwich


  • At some point in your childhood you and your friends went out to play for the last time…and nobody knew it


  • Surgery is stabbing somebody to life


  • “Where are you” is probably the least used sign in sign language


  • An onion forces you to cry over its dead body