The Social Hierarchy of Water Bottles
It’s the story you’ve all been waiting for, the H2Foes.
Maseratis. Mansions. Louis Vuitton. Gucci. Rolex. Inevitable death. Water Bottles.
Water bottles may as well be the next big thing. In fact, they kind of are. In the midst of all the VSCO girls and athletes, or athletes who are VSCO girls, water bottles have come to play a (ridiculously) large role in our generation.
First and foremost, The Hydro Flask. It’s sacred, and it’s the holy grail to everyone who owns one. These extremely overpriced cylindrical tins of steel are a rather odd trend of 2019, despite the first Hydro Flasks being produced over 10 years ago. You’ll notice that most Hydro Flasks have stickers on them, like quotes from The Office or random quirky Pinterest quotes. Hydro Flask is now a $35 million company thanks to almost every high school girl.
The next two are a close race⎯⎯⎯S’well and YETI. Although they’re not nearly as popular as Hydro Flasks, they do hold water pretty well. You’re definitely lying if you say you’ve never seen one of these in the hands of a teenage girl before. S’well is probably the most inconvenient to hold, because it has no strap to hold it by, but it also comes in a large variety of patterns and colors. YETI is by far more durable, because the whole bottle, including the strap, is made out of stainless steel. That won’t be cracking anytime soon.
After that would be Contigo. Contigo water bottles basically represent that famous saying, “less is more”. Ironically, Contigo happens to be the cheapest out of all of these but undeniably a personal favorite. And if you want to go the extra mile, feel free to add quirky stickers to these water bottles too.
Last but definitely not least, the Gatorade Squeeze Water Bottle. This was the ultimate water bottle for almost 6 years. Although I feel like people use these more to spray the water than actually drink them, it serves the same purpose nonetheless, because every young athlete appreciated these to the depth of their core.
That brings us to the end of the Bottle Billboards. Water bottles serve much more of a purpose to our generation than just holding water and hydrating us. As silly as this may seem, the way we use and decorate our water bottles define us in ways we don’t think about. Water bottles aren’t really just water bottles anymore, they’re a way of life.
Khushi is a freshman at NAI. This is her first year as a staff writer for the NaEye newspaper. In her spare time, she enjoys being with her friends,...
Garrafa Termica • Apr 14, 2022 at 3:42 am
Garrafa Termica The word thermos is a genericized trademark used sometimes, since the early 20th century, as a term for any vacuum-insulated flask regardless of manufacturer.